Paralysis

An unending paralyisis
the impeding reality approaches
and the fear ensues
The fear of your return
your tales
your nights alone without me

So paralyze me, keep me immobile
fill my ears with music and my eyes with distractions
anything to evade the truth,
the harsh words on a B line to my heart

My hands tremble despite the paralysis
the butterflies are ravenous kamikazes
attacking and destroying me, from the inside, out
the nervous jitters I once had, now but a burden on my soul
So I will embrace the paraylisis
cover my ears
shut my mouth
and cower in a corner, dignity absent
the fear is too much this time.